June 9, 2006
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I once asked the I-Ching if I ought to carry on writing. The answer was vague enough for me to steer it in the most favourable direction.
I don’t remember why I asked.
I once spent 6 months not writing. I couldn’t. It was devastating. I took an overdose. And then, I don’t know, I got out of it, and began writing again. Walking that stupid line. Not writing. Thinking, well, I can always kill myself. Once it becomes an option, it never stops. Not really.
I seem unable to write again. But only temporarily. I know that. I can feel it’s nothing serious. Just a minor detail. Instead, I do other things. Work on Sein etc. Yesterday I spent most of the day reworking my kissthewitch site. It doesn’t look any different yet. There is much still to do. It took me most of the day just to create one image I like.
And then I ask, why do I do this anyway?
I’ve been reading so much, too little, but so much. I can’t devour the words fast enough. Really, you’d think this would inspire me, but not today.
I am bored. I am at work. I am too hot.
Sometimes I come across writers, artists, photographers who just blow me away. I’m not talking about people with exhibitions and a whole brooding family of novels behind them. I mean, those who are starting up, on xanga, and those who submit to Sein. And I think fuck fuck fuck you are going to make it. You have to make it. Damn, if I had the money I would MAKE you make it.
Here is someone like that. I swear. His writing reminds me of Burroughs, Acker, Kafka… He will not be to everyone’s taste. This fiction is pure weird, bizarro, surreal. Pure genius if you ask me. I am going to serialise his novella ‘Keeping Angels’ in Sein, starting with this coming issue. If you want a taste of his writing. Go here. Unless you have a fear of clowns!
Comments (16)
You are too hot!
I can’t see you not writing/ not being creative. It’d be like you trying not to breathe. You may squeeze the crap out of your muse every now and then, but your a writer to the bone. It’s a terrible curse. -
I feel you. The writing, it ebbs and flows. It will come back. But that’s no comfort in the meantime.
I spent a great deal of time this morning fantasizing about overdosing in the bathtub. I understand that as well.
love love love.
~k
let us sip coffee and discuss our past fantasies.
very neat link…
‘Speaking of poetry, I haven’t read much, but much of what I have read by PP nominees, isn’t even half as good as what you write. ‘
Thank you seductress. I wonder how one gets nomintaed for such an honor–and who does the nominating. I wonder if it has much basis in what magazines one is published in.
not writing? that’s ….’;skf that’s appalling…slfo ijs ‘sdf . appalling my fingers are wonky sjust htinkg ing about it a’sdfk ‘a arrgh not writning lightingi nwritning eehkcl clowsns
I’ll come visit you one day in jolly old England and we shall share chocolate kippers with Manuka and Misrule till the wee hours of the morning, whereupon we will lob great torrents of poo at your neighbours.
Follow your heart sweetie, and all will go well.
hhhmm burroughs is on my list this summer, but it’s a very long list and i’m a very slow reader.
my boyfriend loves that guy much more than he loves me, so i’d like to size him up.
thanks
You continually amaze me by being on both sides of this. A fiercely talented writer yourself and such a generous advocate for the work of others.
Truly magnificent.
thankfully, I am cognizant of the calories in alcohol, and am more prone to doing shots of cheap vodka when I am drinking with a purpose. I love rum, but I don’t drink it lately, so save money and extra pounds. The extra weight is all due to comfort eating, because I tend to eat bread when I am depressed. When someone who doesn’t normally eat a lot of carbs starts intaking more than usual, of course I am going to gain. Doh.
(
I have suffered from eating disorders off and on since age fifteen. I am in a constant state of hatred for my body. I don’t know how I used to go all day without eating, how I used to stay up until four AM just working out. I miss those days, secretly.
‘And then I ask, why do I do this anyway?’
I ask myself that, too. Not about you–about me.
‘Do you enjoy coming up with titles? Do you have a way of finding them eg. title first, poem/blog later? Or do you write first and then come up with the title?’
I rarely come up with a title first. With my blogs, I usually cull the title from the entry at some point. With my poems, I might start off with one or more tentative titles–and then either narrow it down or devise another, better one as my writing process progresses. I do like titles, though. I don’t really get untitled art pieces.
How about you?
of course, take as much as you’d like.
“I seem unable to write again” Ha, so you ARE human, a normal artist! So, you had better get THAT book out and read some Miss K!
J
the internet is the new gallary space, indeed. i can spend hours just browsing art!